"You’re not gay until you suck a dick, remember I said that."
— I’m just gonna make a new tag for all the crazy shit my mom tells me.
"You don’t watch TV, you don’t watch movies, you don’t play lotto, what the fuck do you do for fun, jerk off?"
—

Happy Mother’s Day to you too, grandma

[screaming internally]

"I don’t want to get to the end of my life and find that I have just lived the length of it. I want to have lived the width of it as well."
— Diane Ackerman, American author, poet and naturalist
"Life isn’t about finding yourself. Life is about creating yourself."
— George Bernard Shaw, Irish playwright
"Nobody can go back and start a new beginning, but anyone can start today and make a new ending."
— Maria Robinson, American writer
"When a true genius appears in the world, you may know him by this sign, that the dunces are all in confederacy against him."
— Jonathan Swift, Anglo-Irish writer
"To live is so startling it leaves little time for anything else."
— Emily Dickinson, American poet
"Saints are sinners who kept on going."
— Robert Louis Stevenson, Scottish novelist, poet and essayist
"Action is a great restorer and builder of confidence. Inaction is not only the result, but the cause, of fear."
— Norman Vincent Peale, American minister and author
"You don’t know what you’re doing to these poor people. They’re gonna show up on your front porch drooling all over themselves trying to get with you."
— My mom told me to stop posting selfies because you guys are lusting too hard over me.
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